2000 Best Dad Jokes for Family Gatherings – Instant Icebreaker!

Need to lighten the mood at family events? These dad jokes are guaranteed to get eye rolls… and laughter! Save this list for your next reunion.

All Tags

nsfw spoiler Long Religion Walks into a bar Blonde Knock-Knock Joke MeanJokes Approved Politics dirty dadjoke darkjoke 🍌jokes for kid math jokes yo mama jokes clean dad joke

nahuman 16 day.agoWhy do gay Mandaloreans have the most stable government in Star Wars?

They make sure they always have the Mandate.

OZFox42 16 day.agoOne day, there were two boys playing by a stream.

One of the young boys saw a bush and went over to it. The other boy couldn't figure out why his friend was at the bush for so long. The other boy went over to the bush and looked. The two boys were looking at a woman bathing naked in the stream. All of a sudden, the second boy took off running. The first boy couldn't understand why he ran away, so he took off after his friend. Finally, he caught up to him and asked why he ran away. The boy said to his friend, "My mom told me if I ever saw a naked lady, I would turn to stone, and I felt something getting hard, so I ran."

1232

axeman020 16 day.agoIf a Jedi...

...wants to pleasure themselves before attaining the rank of Master, they don't masturbate... They have a Padawank instead!

whoocaresnotme 16 day.agoWhat’s the biggest difference between a condom and a coffin?

You go in one and cum in the other :)

624

tensor4u 16 day.agoA man scores a hot date

A man scores a hot date Not wanting to disappoint his date in the bedroom, he goes to the doctor to get his penis enlarged. The doctor says, "we happen to have a new experimental procedure that uses muscle cells from an elephant trunk that should do the trick." To which the man accepts. Later on, the man and his date are having dinner. The man is in love with her, but is experiencing an increasingly uncomfortable pressure in his trousers. In an attempt to relieve the pain, he slowly undoes his fly. Immediately, his penis lunges out onto the table, grabs a bread roll and vanishes back under the table. His date, unsurprisingly shocked, slowly smiles and says, "could you do that again?" The man, his eyes watering slightly, replies "probably, but I don't think I can fit another roll in my ass."

1734

Ahmed_Almaddah 16 day.agoFunny how posts are still tagged NSFW

As if any of us still have jobs

1304

ilikesidehugs 17 day.agoIf I see an electrician - I’ll masturbate. If I see a plumber - I’ll masturbate. If I see a carpenter - I’ll masturbate. If I see a welder - I’ll masturbate.

Guess I’m just a jack off all trades.

2648

andersonfmly 17 day.agoWhy do sperm cells like commas and apostrophes?

They often interrupt periods and lead to contractions.

1578

ForsakenCommands 17 day.agoWhat did cetus say to the kraken when discussing about their body morphology

This is what Cetus apart