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2000 Best Dad Jokes for Family Gatherings – Instant Icebreaker!

Need to lighten the mood at family events? These dad jokes are guaranteed to get eye rolls… and laughter! Save this list for your next reunion.

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avatar YZXFILE 15 day.agoMy son was born with 5 penises I was devastated His mother was devastated
His uncle just smiled and said - "his underpants will fit him like a glove..."
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avatar harrygatto 15 day.agoGrandad.
A little girl was usually driven to school by her grandad but one day he was ill so her grandma took her instead. That evening her parents asked her how the journey was. “It was very different”, she said. “How's that”, they asked. “Well”, she said, “during the whole journey we didn't see a single tosser, blind idiot, stupid bastard or wanker”.
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avatar poptheballoon4 15 day.agoWhy don't religious couples ever do roleplay?
Because every time someone says "Oh God," the other starts praying instead of playing.
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avatar Luxodad 15 day.agoComparing symptoms
Two friends, doctors both, used to have a weekly lunch. They got into the habit of discussing cases in case they could learn something new from each other. At lunch, the first doctor said, "I had an unusual case today. A man came in with syphilis of the foot." "Mine was unusual too," said the second doctor. "I had a woman come in with athlete's vagina."
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avatar aprg 15 day.agoWhat does nasal sex involve?
Fuck knows.
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avatar Able-Ground3194 15 day.agoTwo hookers were on a street corner.
They started discussing business and one of the hookers said, "Yep, it's gonna be a good night, I smell cock in the air." The other hooker looked at her and said, "No, no. I just burped.
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avatar Sufficiently_Jokey 16 day.agoTwo neighbours meet over the back fence.
The one says "You idiot! You left your drapes open last night - my brother and I spent half the night watching you fucking your wife!" The neighbour retorts, "Joke's on you, pal; **I** wasn't even home last night!"
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avatar odinMithrandir 16 day.agoQ: What is the best song to play in a glory hole?
Another prick in the wall
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avatar drewhosick 16 day.agoA woman reads in a magazine that milk baths are good for your skin....
Milkman comes by one day and she says can you bring me 25 quarts of milk tomorrow. He says, sure but why? She says I hear it's good for your skin to take a milk bath He says ok but do you want it pasteurized? She says no, just above my tits will be fine.
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avatar Cocakayla 16 day.agoI didn’t do lingerie modeling for the money
I did it for the exposure
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