Sonicmixmaster 1 mon.agoA little boy wakes up 3 nights in a row when he hears a thumping
sound coming from his parents room.Finally one morning he goes to his mom and says, "Mommy, every night I hear you and daddy making noises and when I looked in your bedroom you're bouncing up and down on him." His mom is taken by surprise and says, "Oh, well I'm bouncing on his stomach because he's fat and that makes him thin again." And the boy says, "Well, that won't work!" His mom says, "Why?!?" And the boy replies, "Because the lady next door comes by after you leave each day and blows him back up!"
zefciu 1 mon.agoF@#$%^g SparkA guy walks into a bar and orders a shot of whisky. Instead of drinking it he gargles his mouth and spits
"ghurrrghguuggrrhh, ptu... Fucking Spark".
He orders another and again he does the same thing
"ghurrrghghurrggghguuggrrhh, ptu... Fucking Spark".
The barman sets the third shot beofore him, but this time he asks him, what happened
"So, I was driving my truck with two trailers attached, when some idiot in front of me starts overtaking. I swerved, but my left wheels got stuck in the ditch. No way to get out. I was just going to call for help when a guy in a Chevy Spark stops by and says 'Man, don't worry, I will pull you out'. I was like 'Haha, if you pull me out with that matchbox, I will give you a blowjob'
"glglglghgghhhhhglllgurrr, ptu... Fucking Spark".