"Where have ye been all this time, child? Why did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old Mother through?" The girl, crying, replied, "Dad... I became a prostitute." "Ye what!? Get out a here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this Catholic family." "OK, Dad... as ye wish. I only came back to give mum this luxurious fur coat, title deed to a ten bedroom mansion, plus a 5 million savings certificate. For me little brother, this gold Rolex. And for ye Daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition convertible that's parked outside plus a membership to the country club ... (takes a breath) ... and an invitation for ye all to spend New Year's Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera." "What was it ye said ye had become?", says Dad. Girl, crying again, "A prostitute, Daddy!" "Oh! My Goodness! Ye scared me half to death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant! Come here and give yer old Dad a hug!"
Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.
In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!
The race
The broad's name? Melania
A delivery driver u racist cnt
A quarter pounder with cheese
I guess they aren’t Wayfair to children
A Guillatino
is proof that size doesn't matter
Walking people's fish.
Not there when I wake up.
Me (who skinned a black person): this is why nobody likes you
A MasterBaiter
He said "yes the others were atleast sevens or eights"
Fuk ‘em yung !!!
Stab it repeatedly
African
After he saw the gas bill
I’m pretty sure I’m not though, I have 3 daughters. I would’ve killed 2 of them by now.
In some people's eyes
He got Dee dossed
You either get one of the two things; you’ll taste the ocean, you know plastic... or you’ll get a mouth full of dick.
Huntington's
I dont go to jail when I beat cancer.
The gift that they give to children
A black lad walks in and says "Got anything by The Doors"? I said "yes 2 cameras and an alarm now fuck off".
Cot death
I’d rather be a fruit than a vegetable.
A firecracker
A flamongo .
more jokes Here waiting for you
best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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