A Woman, who owns a pet gorilla, comes home to find that her gorilla has escaped his enclosure and has made his way up a tree in her front yard. After hours of trying to coax him down, she finally concedes to look for help. She finds an ad for an Animal Handler and makes a phone call. A short time later, a truck pulls up and a man with a cowboy hat, carrying a shotgun gets out with his dog. He approaches the distraught woman and she apprises him of the situation. He agrees to help her. The woman quickly asks him, “How are you going to get him down? He turns to the woman, hands her his shotgun, a pair of large handcuffs and describes his plan. “Ma’am, I will climb up the tree, then I will shake the branch your gorilla is sitting on, whereby he will fall to the ground. Once on the ground, my highly trained canine partner will chomp down on his balls rendering him subdued while you slap the cuffs on him until I get down from the tree.” He turns to begin his ascent up the tree when the woman calls out, “Wait! I know what to do with the handcuffs, but what is the shotgun for?” The man turns towards her as he grasps the tree trunk. “Well ma’am, if that gorilla shakes me off the branch, You Shoot That Damn Dog!”
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Because you can’t bring a horticulture
Come around the corner and I’ll show you my hole
Another father came next to him and said beaming with pride: "You see that beauty over there? That's my daughter. She's 3 days old." The first father then said with the happiest heart this world has ever seen: "That cutey patootie is my 1 day old son!" There was silence for a moment and then dad #2 said: "Y'know, maybe one day our kids will marry, you never know!" And the first one answered: "Yeah sure...why not?" But deep down he was thinking: "Not in this world, nor the next, will I ever let my son marry someone thrice his age!"
Guess i should have seen a psychotherapist
A Lumberjack is walking in the forest when a tree yells..stop! You can’t chop me down because I’m a talking tree! The Lumberjack says even though you’re a talking tree you’ll dialogue.
Because she wanted to be a cool grandma.
When I opened it up it was silent.
In-N-Out
Bear able
He prefers a short round
more jokes Here waiting for you
best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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