mmaduska 14 day.agoA man jogging on the beach hears a woman crying…He approaches and sees a woman with no arms and legs laying on a towel. “Is everything okay?” He asks “No” she says “because I have no arms or legs I’ve never been kissed” The man looks around to be sure no one is looking and then leans down and gives the woman a kiss. “Oh thank you so much!” She exclaimed. The man jogged along, happy he could help the woman. The very next day the man is jogging along the beach and again hears a woman crying. As he approaches he sees the same woman and again asks what’s wrong. “Well, as you can see I have no arms or legs and therefore have never been fucked” she says. The man looks around nervously to be sure nobody is looking, quickly picks the woman up and tosses her into the ocean and yells: “There! Now you’re fucked!”
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A firecracker
A flamongo .
...they treat food recipes like sex, they keep it in the family.
Ooga Boogaloo
A bath bomb
So I just burned her for good
Your dads dick tastes funny
Her miscarriage
'You know what? You are a better fuck than our moter' She says: 'Yes, I know, dad told me that.'
We have to give props to kobe, I mean he was the only black father to take their kids with him
Your computer doesn't freak out when you accidentally cum on it.
Because at night the sky is dark
Cracker with cheese
At least we know why he kept making all those child prodigy videos now
Me and my sister were talking to my baby sister and I jokingly said”do you understand me” after talking. So my sister (not baby sister) says,“I don’t think she speaks weirdo”. So I said,”then why are you talking to her”. And she was so shocked and grumpy she didn’t talk to me for a while.
A woman with no rights
They vote
Cause they’ve got a lot on their chest
At least 600,000 babies per year would disagree.
Ginger Ale
Her mom follows her into the basement and doesn’t see the body. “April fools!” The little girl exclaims, “he did it in the garage!”
For example, when you shove them down the stairs.
If you missed the showing in Seattle, don't worry, you can still catch it in Atlanta, Minneapolis, NY, Portland, and More TBD.
It was then that dave found out that his wife who had Alzheimer's had progressed so badly that she forgot her husband
"Me-Don't Worry, It'll End Soon." "Me-Ok, Ok, That's The Last One fr." Next Week- Everyone, Crying, In The Graveyard.
Go stand in front of a mirror
An adoption agency
On an unrelated note, Charlie Daniels wasn’t that good at the violin.
An earthquake.
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best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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