Joker King - find funny jokes from here.
Joker King - find funny jokes from here.
mmaduska 15 day.agoA man jogging on the beach hears a woman crying…He approaches and sees a woman with no arms and legs laying on a towel. “Is everything okay?” He asks “No” she says “because I have no arms or legs I’ve never been kissed” The man looks around to be sure no one is looking and then leans down and gives the woman a kiss. “Oh thank you so much!” She exclaimed. The man jogged along, happy he could help the woman. The very next day the man is jogging along the beach and again hears a woman crying. As he approaches he sees the same woman and again asks what’s wrong. “Well, as you can see I have no arms or legs and therefore have never been fucked” she says. The man looks around nervously to be sure nobody is looking, quickly picks the woman up and tosses her into the ocean and yells: “There! Now you’re fucked!”
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Neither did she
They rearranged the furniture.
I don't care if she has either
It was for impersonating an officer
The bartender says "what will it be officer?"
i had no idea what i was doing, but dad was sure keen to show me
While kids in foreign countries bring their MP3 players to school, we bring our MP5s! ​ EDIT: We now bring MP7s. EDIT #2: We now bring MP9s! Holy shit, we really upgraded quickly! EDIT #3: Well shit, it's lockdown... hope we get an MP11 sooner or later!
N_ _ _ _ _ _ s
More like third reich feminism
Doctor-Whats wrong? Me-I love to help blind and mute people, I think I'm insane!! Doctor-How is that bad?? Me- I mean the adjective
Jack Daniels comes alive when you add coke.
because they have developed a taste for pepper spray.
I shouted, “My money's on the one with the knife!" You should’ve seen them both run away.
I think it's because he's got an overactive knife and fork.
I was only protecting him from a sniper. Lucky for him I saw the laser sight before the guy took one in the head.
I think it was a fitting metaphor for his company’s attitude to battery life.
Unless there are no seals around.
Your putting your kids behind bars.
They can't tell you "no."
taking the art out of rap artist.
They're afraid to get near the oven
One's a Bat Digger, and the other's a fat nigger.
Her nose is running
Because no Jewish woman will touch anything that isn’t twenty percent off.
Nothing, if you are the Pope
Contemplating suicide when a nasty old bum walked up and asked her what she was doing. "I'm going to kill myself" she said. The bum then asked "Well, if you're gonna kill yourself do you wanna have sex first?" "Oh Hell no!" the girl replied. "Fine" said the bum. "I'll just wait at the bottom then"
At the nursing home I am getting rid of evidence
To which he responds: “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
So I'll make your HOLE weak :)
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