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avatar nebulavivi 1 mon.ago

I only drink on two occasions..

When it’s my birthday, and when it’s not

dadjoke

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. What is a pirates favorite letter?

Kid or your poor SO: < typical answer of “R” > In your best pirate accent: “no, for it is but the Sea”

2. Why does Earth Day not affect /r/jokes?

Because everything is already 100% recycled.

3. A mother was walking down the hall when she heard a humming sound coming from her daughter's bedroom. When she opened the door, she found her daughter naked on the bed with a vibrator.

'What are you doing?' the mother exclaimed. The daughter replied, 'I'm 35 and still living at home with my parents, and this is the closest I'll ever get to a husband.' Later that week the father was in the kitchen and heard a humming sound coming from the basement. When he went downstairs, he found his daughter naked on the sofa with her vibrator. 'What are you doing?!' he exclaimed. The daughter replied, 'I'm 35 and still living at home with my parents, and this is the closest I'll ever get to a husband.' A couple of days later, the mother heard the humming sound again, this time in the living room. In there, she found her husband watching the Super Bowl on television with the vibrator buzzing away beside him. 'What are you doing?' she exclaimed. He replied............'Watching the game with my son-in-law.

4. I've been trying to explain the Sunk Cost Fallacy to my son for forty minutes straight now and he's no nearer understanding than when I started.

But if I quit now I'll have had all this trouble for nothing!

5. What's the difference between a dozen cocks and a joke?

Yo mama can't take a joke!!

6. Why are bosses like diapers?

Because they’re always on your ass and full of shit

7. What vegetable is always served burnt?

Chard

8. How do you make number one disappear ?

You add a "g" and its gone

9. My friends and family were worried that I was not in contact on my trip into the Grand Canyon.

I told them that I was in a deep depression.

10. An old Japanese gardener asked me what I knew about bonsai trees.

I said..."Very little."

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Here, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!

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