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avatar ConfederateSuck 1 year.ago

Why didn't Elvis hit his wife?

Because he didn't like hitting kids

darkjoke

nsfw

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. I took my dog to a baseball game. He caught the homerun ball and brought it back to me.

It was farfetched.

2. I went camping at a campground right on the ocean where you can feed the dolphins fish from your campsite.

For all in tents and porpoises, it was a really great experience

3. I laid in bed last night just staring at the stars and wondering..

What the hell happened to my roof?!

4. Don't hate me for this

I took my kids on a night out for fun... as we was leaving they are jumping around excited I say looms like u guys had a ball... They stop and stared at me straight faced.... EVERY ONE DID DAD YOU TOOK US BOWLING

5. What did Nute Gunray say after Obi-Wan Kenobi fought Darth Maul?

"This is getting out of hand! Now, there are two of him!"

6. A beaver argues with Pinocchio

The insults flared back and forth till the beaver told Pinocchio "You know, I should show you my original talent! I chew wood!" Pinocchio laughs and says "Oh good, I could use a circumcision!" And the beaver says "I'd need a meal, not a snack!"

7. Why was the mushroom not a fungi during game night?

He engaged in too much shiitake!

8. What do you call walking in Bear country in Alaska alone and unarmed?

Going to the Maul

9. My prof said we’re going to have a test covering all the oceans in the world

I said Can you be more Pacific

10. My girlfriend says she doesn't trust me.

I guess it's just one more thing she has in common with my wife.

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