jokeKing logo

Joker King - find funny jokes from here.

avatar UniqueCold3812 2 year.agoDonald Trump was asked " what is 2+2"??

"I have to say a lot of people have been asking this question. No, really. A lot of people come up to me and they ask me. They say, 'Sir!, What's 2+2?' And I tell them look, we know what 2+2 is. We've had almost eight years of the worst kind of math you can imagine. Oh my god, I can't believe it. Addition and subtraction of the 1s the 2s and the 3s. Its terrible. Its just terrible. Look, if you want to know what 2+2 is, do you want to know what 2+2 is? I'll tell you. First of all the number 2, by the way I love the number 2. It's probably my favorite number, no it is my favorite number. You know what, it's probably more like the number two but with a lot of zeros behind it. A lot. If I'm being honest, I mean, if I'm being honest. I like a lot of zeros. Except for Marco Rubio, now he's a zero that I don't like. Though, I probably shouldn't say that. He's a nice guy but he's like, '10101000101', on and on, like that. He's like a computer! You know what I mean? He's like a computer. I don't know. I mean, you know. So, we have all these numbers and we can add them and subtract them and add them. TIMES them even. Did you know that? We can times them OR divide them, they don't tell you that, and I'll tell you, no one is better at the order of operations than me. You wouldn't believe it. That I can tell you. So, we're gonna be the best on 2+2, believe me. OK? Alright. Thank you." Reporter 1: "But what actually is 2+2?" Trump: "Siddown. No, siddown. I've already answered your question. Haven't I already answered your question. This is what we get from news reporters, folks. Give me a nice question. Yes - you." Reporter 2: "Is your name Donald Trump?" Trump: "Now that's a nice question, folks. That's what I want." Edit. To all people spamming my inbox with hate message. It's literally just a joke. Learn to take a joke like a joke or don't browse r/Jokes. Edit 2:- to the person who called reddit care on me thanks for your concern but no thanks I don't need it. I am mentally sound and physically fit. Edit 3:- To the person who messaged >I will see how you joke after i share your address libtard. Yeah I gonna keep a tab on your I'd mf. Let's see where is your home. I will spare you the effort. I live in India. Come and get me bro. Your entitled ass won't survive 2 minutes in the heat and humidity of here. All jokes aside i am little scared how much people can get charged up over a innocent joke.

44676
3310
Recommend Jokes

Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. What do you call a group of black women?

A farmer's toolshed. (If you didn’t get it it’s because they’re hoes)

2. It’s a shame automatic rifles are banned

Now I have to pull the trigger every time I see a kid.

3. What do Californian feminists and Middle-eastern feminists have in common?

They both get stoned.

4. What’s the difference between pizza and Jews?

Pizza didn’t do 9/11

5. What does a baby look like when you hit it with a lawn mower?

I dont know-i close my eyes when I cum

6. How do you kill a Briton?

Poison his tea and hide the antidote in a tube of toothpaste.

7. Why are priests called Father?

Because it's too suspicious to call them Daddy.

8. Whats the difference between Santa clause and a jew?

Santa goes DOWN the chimney

9. Grammar.

The difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit.

10. What’s the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead negro in the road?

The dead dog has skid marks in front of it

11. Disappointment

running into a wall with a boner and breaking your nose first

12. Talk dirty to me

I'm gonna get you wetter than a spastics chin

13. Why are most North Koreans left handed?

Because they have no rights.

14. I was having rough sex with my German girlfriend

For some reason she kept screaming her age instead of the correct safeword

15. What’s the difference between you and me?

I am not a meth head.

16. I thought of making a groping joke

In the end I didn’t. It’s a touchy subject

17. A Chinese man was eating some eggroll, but was short the equivalent of one cent.

He said, “I'll give you my girl! Hopefully that will be enough to cover it!” The restaurant got him arrested anyway since girls are worthless in China.

18. What kind of punch can kill 6 adults and 20 children?

A Sandy Hook.

19. What’s in a seven-course meal in Ireland?

A six-pack of beer and a potato.

20. An obese women told me a joke.

I didn't laugh but the floor was cracking up

21. What do you call a black astronaut?

Coon on the moon

22. What do you call kids outside of a school zone?

Speed bumps

23. All feminists are lesbians but..

All lesbians are feminists

24. What kind of martial arts do people with Down syndrome and an amputated leg practice?

Partial arts

25. Why did the black boy fall off his bike? He didn't. He fell off your bike.

26. What type of music are homeless people unable to hear?

House music.

27. I like my women how i like my deer

Usually found dead on the side of the road

28. How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg?

Pick it up and suck its cock.

29. If you want to save money this Christmas,

now is the perfect time to tell the kids that Santa didn't make it through the pandemic.

30. I'm absolutely exhausted from my French self-defence class last night.

I've never run so far in all my life.

more jokes Here waiting for you

best dad jokesjokes for adult
Welcome to Joker King – Your Daily Dose of Happiness!

Here, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!

Feeling down? Click in—guaranteed smiles! 😆