He sits them all down and tells them: "There is bound to come a time in this company when you will hit a sudden economic crisis. When these times come you must know how to cut down on expenses and do the best you can with what budget you have." Then he proceeds to give them each 1000 dollars, and tells them that he will come back to the mine in a week, and see which of them have been able to move the most ore with the money they were given. He returns after one week to check up on them, and approaches his oldest son. "How much digging have you been able to do?", he asks. "3 tons of ore, father. I used 300 dollars to buy a broken digger, I then used my business contacts to find a mechanic willing to fix it for just 200 dollars if I gave his 5 kids a job. The youth is so desperate for a job this day, they will do 12 hour shifts even for an internship, and I only had to pay them 100 dollars each for a week of work" The father pats his son proudly on the shoulder before moving on to his middle child, asking him how much mining he had been able to do as well. "10 tons of ore, father. I used 100 dollars to run a local ad in the newspaper asking for workers, then took in 75 undocumented immigrants who all brought their own tools and shovels. They're all so afraid of being taken by immigration that they're willing to work for half minimum wage." The father looks skeptically at his son for a while, but notices the massive piles of ore the workers are carrying out, and gives him a nod before carrying on to his youngest son. "How much mining have you been able to do?", asks the father. "35 tons, dad, but I didn't use any of the budget." The father looks at him in awe, his jaw dropping, "how were you able to move 35 tons of ore for free!?" "I invited a bunch of conspiracy theorists. They just keep digging deeper and deeper thinking they're going to find something, and every time I tell them to take a break they accuse me of trying to withhold the truth from them!"
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A Jew with a coupon.
It can be done with a credit card, but I prefer to use a knife.
Let God Burn Them Quickly
Santa Claus goes down your chimney
They would eat the bat
Garbage gets picked up
My Grandpa said, "Your generation relies too much on technology!" I replied, "No, *your* generation relies too much on technology!" I then proceeded to unplug his life support.
Ranji is a 9 year old boy living in Namibia. He only has 1 leg, 1 arm, and 1 eye. Each day, Ranji has to ride 7 miles to school along a narrow road on a rusty bike with bent wheels, no brakes, and only the opposite pedal. If you send just $2, I’ll send you the video, it’s fucking hilarious.
Dialogue: Thor Lorgen
Then it would cut itself
when they get pulled over by a police officer. The cop approaches the priests vehicle and says to the driver "Sorry to pull you over father, but we're looking for a couple of child molesters" The two priests look at each other for a few moments and have a few quiet words to each other. The driver turns back to the cop and says; «Alright officer, we'll do it»
To get to the other side.
He said, "Nice shirt faggot." I replied, "Thanks, it's 100% cotton. Tell your grandparents I said thanks."
Which of course made me extremely upset when my birthday came around, because I had nothing to wish for.
So I put my money back in my pocket, just in case he's right.
A PDF file
is he charged with assault, or child abuse?
Your mother's cunt gets some new content every once in a while. Seriously, the amount of reposts going on in the past few months, both comments and posts, is sickening.
She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."
Kid stops crying when the gun goes off in it's mouth
If you leave yogurt alone for 200 years it develops a culture
The line at KFC.
At least he took 300 infidels with him too.
So every once in a while, when no one"s looking...you just have to stick it in a handicap one.
2 tight ends and a wide receiver
Most of them are gold diggers
Put Velcro on the ceiling and tell it to jump
Horses
"Dad!!" my daughter screamed. "Mike is lovely!" "I know." I replied. "I was talking to him."
Spray and pray.
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