They arrive at the club and the doorman says, "Hey, Dave! How ya doin'?" His wife is puzzled and asks if hes been to this club before. "Oh no," says Dave. "Hes on my bowling team." When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if hed like his usual and brings over a Budweiser. His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says,"How did she know that you drink Budweiser?" "Shes in the Ladies Bowling League, honey. We share lanes with them." A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Dave, and says "Hi Davey. Want your usual table dance, big boy?" Daves wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club. Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her. He tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it. She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every name in the book. The cabby turns his head and says, "Looks like you picked up a real bitch tonight, Dave.
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Are You Tighter Than a Fifth Grader?
Cervical cancer
Because there are targets on every corner.
One, if it is a man.
Look for the cardboard sign.
Last night we tried anal, she kept shouting 9! That's the best I've done so far.
Most of the german genocides can be swept under the carpet
She started her period. Edit: This joke courtesy of the homeless guy outside the 7-11. I tipped him a beer.
The whites are usually pretty useless
The Nazi
When you dump a load in the washer, It will not follow you around for two months.
It got a million stars.
Go ahead, call the police, we'll see who comes first.
The police say it's the worst case of suicide they've ever seen.
One is on the cover of Playboy and one is on the cover of National Geographic.
I feel bad for muslims because they are all portrayed as being angry people I just think they just have a short fuse
38 Cent
"Oh say can you see..."
A crime fighter. __ xpost - r/sickipedia
He wasn't invited
Traction in the mud
"I feel like a kid again!"
Hell
House prices down.
that's probably why they get paid less
They both make black guys run faster.
Santa goes down the chimney
Egypt 8, Ethiopia didn't.
A black guy runs crying home to his mom saying “all the other kids in my class know their ABC’s, but I only got as far as H. Am I stupid?” No, his mom replied. “It's because you're black”. A couple of days later he runs crying home again. “All the other kids know how to count to 100, but I only got to 32. Am I stupid?” No, his mom replied again. “It's because you're black”. The next day he runs home with a big grin on his face saying, “me and the other boys measured our dicks and mine was the biggest. Is it because I'm black?” No, said his mom. “It's because all the kids are 6 years old and you're 29”.
It's simple meth.
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best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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