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avatar Crocodile_Banger 5 day.ago

My Asian sister just gave birth to a girl

She’s my japaniece

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. Does a boat travel in km?

Obviously knot!

2. My manager fired me today from my job as a “sandwich artist”, because he caught me about to put my dick into the pickle slicer

She got fired too.

3. I like my women like I like my coffee

Hot, black, and ready to be filled with cream

4. Apropos current events

Believing a politician cares about you is like believing a stripper really likes you.

5. Why don't chinchillas clean themselves in the rain man?

Because they are busy dustin off man.

6. A zookeeper went to the animal supplier to buy some new waterfowl for his zoo

He got two egrets, four herons, and several spoonbills. Once they were situated in the waterfowl exhibit, most of the birds took to their new surroundings easily, but one of the egrets and one of the spoonbills were clearly unhappy, refusing to eat or socialize or even explore the enclosure. So he took these two birds back to the dealer to ask if he could replace them. The dealer said that he'd be happy to provide a replacement for the sick spoonbill, but unfortunately he would not be able to give the zookeeper a substitute egret, as that would conflict with his philosophy toward life. "And what philosophy would that be?" asked the zookeeper. The dealer replied: "No re egrets."

7. A couple were making mad passionate love when there came the sound of a car pulling into the driveway.

The woman said, "Oh no. My husband. Go hide in the closet." About halfway to the closet, the guy suddenly stopped for a moment and remarked, "Wait a minute...... I'M your husband. I have a few questions for you." The woman replied, "And I have a few for you, too".

8. I like people like I like my tea.

In a bag. Underwater.

9. Told my wife to be honest to herself, and just embrace her mistake.

Gave me the biggest hug in the world!

10. Which organization doesn't offer its guests hot coffee?

ICE

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