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avatar TheQuietKid22 2 day.ago

Why did the two childhood friends buy a lot of tomato sauce?

They had a lot of things to ketchup on.

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. Judge: I order you to pay $10000.

Mario: Why? Judge: It's a fine. Mario: (Sadly) no, itsa not.

2. Judge: I order you to pay $10000.

Mario: Why? Judge: It's a fine. Mario: (Sadly) no itsa not.

3. What do you call a retired prostitute these days?

An After-Thot.

4. My kids got an internship at a silver mine this summer

He’s having a blast

5. Did you know that some turtles are Jewish?

Shell-Home

6. The guy at the pawnshop said the watch I bought would run for 30 days without winding.

I asked him how long it would run if I did wind it.

7. What’s a braindead person’s least favourite song?

My Heart Will Go On

8. What's Billie Ellish's favorite Thai food?

It's the pad Thai, duh.

9. I thought I had to poop earlier,

Turns out it was a farts alarm!

10. My wife's contractions were getting closer so we dashed off to the hospital.

After getting checked in, the obstetrician came into the room, examined my wife, wrote "Annie" on her chart and left the room. We were obviously confused and asked the nurse what it meant. She said "This means you can go home -- there won't be a baby today." Even more confused we asked how she was able to interpret that. She told us "The doctor is a big fan of musicals. His note means 'The son will come out tomorrow'"

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