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avatar OctoberFire1 3 day.ago

What do police hotlines and glory holes have in common?

They both rely on anonymous tips. *just heard this today and had to share*

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. I took my friend whose a DJ fishing one time and it was horrible

He kept dropping the bass.

2. Burglars took all of my possessions but left my Play-Doh collection

I don't know what to make of it

3. A mortician was working late one night.

He examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, about to be cremated, and made a startling discovery. Schwartz had the largest private part he had ever seen! 'I'm sorry Mr. Schwartz,' the mortician commented, 'I can't allow you to be cremated with such an impressive private part. It must be saved for posterity.' So, he removed it, stuffed it into his briefcase, and took it home. 'I have something to show you won't believe,' he said to his wife, opening his briefcase. 'My God!' the wife exclaimed, 'Schwartz is dead!'

4. Smell this

Hnmm, does this smell like chloroform to you?

5. I just landed a marketing position at a company that makes foam rubber…

So far it seems like a pretty cushy job.

6. Why do dodo birds' nests smell bad?

Because their eggs-stink.

7. I gave my new girlfriend a medieval battle uniform to polish while I went to the bar.

She always said she wanted a night in, shining armor.

8. What did the plátano say when he lost his phone?

Where mofongo?

9. Why do Norwegians put barcodes on the side of their boats?

So they can scan de navy in

10. What do you call the priest on Sesame Street?

Pastor of Muppets

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