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avatar gdacunto 3 day.ago

I started running and working out a bit more and I woke up this morning feeling a bit rough and told my wife “book a ticket to Jurassic park cus ya boys a sore-us.” 🦖

She laughed. The Home Depot theme played in the background. Solid start to the day.

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. Why was the Egg all worn out

They just got laid by some chick

2. What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?

After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

3. Do you know what being vegan is?

It's a huge missed steak.

4. I got embarrassed when my wife caught me playing with my son's train set on my own. In a panic I threw a quilt over it.

I think I managed to cover my tracks.

5. Reese Witherspoon’s sister has a daughter in college. She wrote a paper about how poop can be used as a fuel source.

It was Reese’s niece’s thesis on feces.

6. Did you know that Disney is America’s largest military contractor?

They drop more bombs than Lockheed Martin.

7. Justice is a dish best served cold

If it were served warm, it would be just water

8. What's it called when Geralt of Rivia has pinkeye?

>! Conjunction of the Spheres !<

9. I recently redid my house, but the people who did it made it look like a cheap version of Las Vegas

Well that's what I get for hiring a RENOvation company

10. Remember the Alamo

I’ll never rent from them again

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