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avatar SwollenPoon 1 day.ago

What did one snowman, say to the other snowman?

Is it just me, or does everything smell like carrots?!

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In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. I was standing at an airport bar in an international departures when this small Japanese guy comes in, stands next to me, and starts drinking a beer. I asked him, "Do you know any of those martial arts things, like Karate or Ju-Jitsu?"

He says "No and **why the fuck** would you ask me that? Is it because I am Japanese?" "No", I said, "It's because you're drinking my beer, you little fucker."

2. Brain surgery is the hardest because:

The organ is encased in bone.

3. I'm giving my boss a Mother's Day card...

I feel it's only fitting since everyone on my job says that he's a mutha...

4. The farting conundrum

Some questions we will never know the answer to. Like why is it whenever someone farts they are always a) behind me, and b) gone by the time I turn around? My kids love this, by which I mean they groan and say "Stop it, Dad!"

5. I asked Paul mcCartney for directions to the Abbey Rd studios.

He pointed and said take that Long and Winding road.

6. What did Sam do when he went to Korea?

Sam sung.

7. What do you call a blind fish?

Whatever you like, it's no like his hearing is any better...

8. What do you call a werewolf youtuber?

Lycansubscribe

9. Roommates

One roommate says to the other "Hey, what's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain?" "I dunno," says the second one. "That's what I thought," yells the first. "Now clean it up!"

10. What do you call a noble chook?

A roostercrat.

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