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avatar Olympiano 3 day.ago

The Linguistic Civil War

The periods tried to end it. Semicolons rallied disparate forces, and ampersands tried to bring everyone together. Parentheses huddled round the worried masses. Quotation marks established communications, and letters sent word back home. Commas just let it continue, especially the useless Oxford ones. Exclamation marks escalated the situation. Dashes made a run for it. The slashes were particularly violent, and were on both sides. Colons betrayed everyone, the assholes. When the SS came knocking at their door, the apostrophes didn’t know where to go. When the days were numbered, the assistance of numerals really counted for something. It’s over now, and perpetrators sentenced. Question marks are organising the inquiry. But the ellipses say there’s more to come.

dadjoke

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