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avatar Raw_Ghee 4 day.ago

What did the leper say to the prostitute?

Keep the tip!

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. My buddy went to the hardware store.

He said "They doubled the price of the hexagonal thing with a threaded hole." I said "That's nuts!"

2. Back in high school my Environmental Science teacher had a way of always comparing Nature to a woman. So It’s really his fault I got those women pregnant.

He always said "aye when ye get Bonnie bared don’t pollute!”

3. A mentally challenged guy had sex with multiple women and left without saying goodbye.

Talk of the town was that the nut screws and bolts.

4. What's the difference between kinky and perverted?

KInky you use a feather, perverted you use the whole chicken.

5. A schizophrenic, a priest and a cat walk into a bar

Schizophrenic order a pint of beer, the priest orders a glass of wine. The cat being unable to decide turns to priest for suggestion. The priest turns to schizophrenic and asks him "How is it possible this cat can talk? " To which the schizophrenic answers "It's not possible because none of this is real. I have schizophrenia. The cat, you and this whole bar is a delusion". Priest, visibly relieved says "That's a relief, for a second there I thought I'm losing my mind"

6. I like most math jokes...

...but jokes about graphing functions? That's where I draw the line.

7. What three words do you never want to hear when you're making love?

Honey I'm home!

8. Curiosity

The main cause of divorce is marriage.

9. Why are ghosts so bad at telling lies?

>!because they are transparent!<

10. My vegan friend is named Hunter

But I call him Gatherer

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