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avatar anonymousPuncake1 14 day.ago

Why did a literature teacher use a pencil?

He/she wanted to draw comparisons.

dadjoke

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. Two calfs were nursing at the same time.

One said, we should stick to each udder.

2. What did Spartacus say when the lion ate his wife?

Nothing. He was gladiator.

3. I took out a loan to pay for an exorcism.

If I don’t pay it back, I’m going to get repossessed

4. A donkey brings one guy named Jesus into town and he gets mentioned in the Bible.

But when I bring nine guys named Jesus into town, I get charged with alien smuggling.

5. What did the two day old baby say to the one day old baby?

I was not born yesterday!

6. My wife told me that I should embrace my mistakes

I gave her a hug

7. Whats the difference between pink and purple?

The strength of the grip

8. Never put things off until tomorrow, unless it's...

Netflix and chocolate, never put that off, that can easily be done tonight.

9. The Insects and the Rodents decided to have a football match.

After the first quarter the insects were losing badly, they were missing one player. Captain Cockroach called a time-out, went to the locker room and found Mr.Centipede still sitting there. "Hey! Mr.centipede, why aren't you on the field?" asked Captain Cockroach. "Sorry captain, I'm still putting on my shoes," said Mr.Centipede.

10. My wife asked if I wanted to bang this weekend

Me: Sorry I can't this weekend. Wife: You "can't this weekend"? Why? Me: I don't know, you haven't told me that part yet.

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