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avatar Forgind1 27 day.ago

Why should you always take your plastic surgeon to the gym before going under the knife?

To check their form when they do a face-lift.

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. Why don’t ants get sick?

2. What do you call someone whose coping mechanism for social anxiety is going on their phone and inadvertently becoming a wealth of knowledge by reading anything about everything on the internet?

Human Bing

3. Why was the cannon sad when it looked in the mirror?

Because it saw that it had MOOBs

4. What's the difference between an oral and a rectal thermometer?

.... the taste

5. Two neighbors, both elderly gentlemen, are having coffee one morning.

"You should put up heavier curtains in your bedroom," one man says. "I could see you making love to your wife last night." "That shows how good your eyesight is," says the other with a laugh. "I wasn't even home last night!"

6. My buddies said I should take the bus home because I was too drunk to drive my car.

Turns out I was too drunk to drive the bus as well.

7. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get the song "Delilah" out of my head. I went to see a psychologist, he told me I had Tom Jones Syndrome. I told him I'd never heard of that before.

He said "It's not unusual".

8. A woman I slept with told me I had the biggest penis she’d ever seen.

Turned out she was blind. She was just pulling my leg

9. Hey dad, who would win a burping contest, you or me?

I don’t know son. Your gas is as good as mine.

10. What's another name for breast reduction surgery?

Decupitation

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