Luxodad 12 day.agoPaying guestA man, about 80, goes to his doctor for a checkup because he is planning to get married. After congratulations and a clean bill of health, the doctor asks about his fiancée. The old man shows him a photo of a very beautiful, mid-twenties young lady. Thinking his patient might not be able to keep up with the physical stress of married life, he says, "I think you should consider getting a paying guest to keep your wife company while you have your regular naps." The patient agrees. Months later, the doctor bumps into the old man and asks, "How is married life?" The patient says, "Congratulate me, doctor. My wife is pregnant." The doctor congratulates him, and asks, "And did you take my advice about the paying guest?" "I certainly did, doctor. Thank you for that advice." "I see it worked out then," said the doctor, trying hard to hide his smile. "Oh yes, it did. She's pregnant too."
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In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!
Neither of them have killed you yet
Isn’t it ironic that Eid al-Fitr sounds like Adolf Hitler?
You could never here his accent
Because they're actually heard.
Parallel Parkinsons.
I wanted to shake his hand but it was already shaking.
A nagger you racist fuck
so I could say "I hit juul all the time".
You put floss over their eyes.
Throw in some laundry and detergent
Man, it's hard blowing that thing and keeping someone pinned down at the same time.
do they come out of the cabinet?
Throw a flash bang
I'm not a fan of these distorted standards for men, how's a regular guy meant to compete with Stephen Hawking?
he gets tasered by police just to charge his phone.
Optimistic...
A horse
Cotton candy
Use their teddy bear to wipe the blood off their pussy.
Should I call it”Kinderhub” or “Only kids”?
A Samboni
There used to be 2 but now it’s a sensitive subject
Mini golf
Now he's an atheist.
So i just pushed her down from 6th floor. kidding it was the 8th floor
I was fucking sore at the end, but at least my dad came...
I love your confidence!! if I were you I wouldn't be No one is perfect!! You just proved it Great idea!! Please never think again Wow you killed it!! Now do it to yourself KEEP IT GOING
she finally snapped.
They’re both mostly plastic.
more jokes Here waiting for you
best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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