Joker King - find funny jokes from here.
Joker King - find funny jokes from here.
Luxodad 15 day.agoRoofer's assistantA roofer employed a young lady as assistant on a trial basis. On her first day, he took her to a job site and told her to stay down while he worked on the roof. Her job was to be sending up whichever tool he needed in a basket that he would haul up by rope. All was going well and various tools were sent up from time to time and collected when the roofer sent them back down. All communication was by signing for whatever the roofer needed as he was too high up for his voice to carry. The roofer then needed a saw, and he made a sawing motion. The girl responded with a shake of the head. The roofer made the sawing motion again. This time, the girl pointed to him, to her left breast and then to her bottom. After a couple of these exchanges, the roofer made violent sawing motions, showing his anger. This time too, the girl pointed to him, to her left breast and to her bottom again. Angry and frustrated, the roofer came all the way down and berated her, "What's the matter? Can't you follow a simple instruction?" The girl replied, "What's wrong with you, being angry at me like that from all the way up there?" The roofer said, "I was signing that I wanted the saw and you wouldn't send it up." The girl said, "And I was signing that you left it behind."
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In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!
Neither works without a chain.
I'm not sure what she was more upset about: that I was fucking our daughter, or that the abortion clinic let me bring her home.
He lived at home until he was 30, was homeless for two years and wound up on death row
Not really good for anything, but make you smile when you push them down the stairs.
maybe that's why they get paid less.
There's never any dental records and all the DNA is the same.
Because his wife died
Neighbor
“It’s not stealing if no one wants it”
He just can’t hold it
Rape.
By putting flowers on his grave.
He didn't want to miss the midnight premier of Planet of the Apes.
I'd give a shit if I lost 6 million dollars.
How am I supposed to know, after 6 minutes I'm done jacking off and have lost all interest.
A Sandy Hook.
Trick question, feminists can't change anything
Because they bring out the kid in you.
A turkey
Usually all the best ones are taken, so when no ones looking, stick it in the disabled one.
Apparently Bankruptcy was the wrong answer.
My cock.
Looked like a lady, walked like a lady, talked like a lady, it was only when she drove me to her place and reversed the car into the garage I thought, " Hang on a fucking minute"
See-Four
Get pulled over, the cop tells them " I'm sorry to bother you but we're looking for two child molesters" the priests look at each other, talk for a minute and say " ok we'll do it"
He was caught drinking on the job!
Because they have to.
Nobody should ever be subjected to country music.
Afterwards the doctor comes in and tells them, "I have good news and bad news." Concerned, they ask for the bad news first. He tells them that the baby is a ginger. The parents say, "Well I guess we can learn to live with a ginger baby. It might not be so bad. What's the good news?" "It's dead!"
He couldn't get his dick out of the chicken
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best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
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