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Scene in a lawyer’s office

Nick was sitting in his attorney's office. “Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?" the lawyer said. “Give me the bad news first." “Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars." “That's the bad news?" asked Nick. “I can't wait to hear the terrible news." “The terrible news is that it's of you and your secretary."

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. Would a smoked cheese grow on a tree?

No, but an Applewood

2. A teacher, a lawyer and a priest are on a sinking ship.

A crew member yells out "Men and woman on the life boats first." The teacher, all distraught, says "What about the children?" The lawyer replies "Fuck the kids." The priest says "Do you think we have time?"

3. The shovel was ground breaking.

But the broom is what swept the nation.

4. If having sex for money makes you a whore...

Then does having sex for free make you a non-profit whoreganisation?

5. Went to a restaurant on the moon

Food was good but the mood was horrible. It had no atmosphere.

6. So a guy goes to the hospital and says doctor help me I’m shrinking

And the doctor says “now now, you’re just going to have to be a little patient”

7. Yo mama so old, she has a great recipe for wooly mammoth steaks

8. Dad jokes should always be kid-friendly

Last time I told one, three little goats laughed so hard they fell off a bridge

9. Original one from my 8 yr old boy

What’s a frog’s favorite band - The Beatles

10. Original joke from my 8 yr old boy

If there was a soccer game between humans and bugs, the humans would crush it.

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