There was a Scottish house painter named Smokey MacGregor who was very interested in making a penny where he could, so he often thinned down his paint to make it go a wee bit further. As it happened, he got away with this for some time, but eventually the Baptist Church decided to do a big restoration job on the outside of one of their biggest buildings. Smokey put in a bid, and because his price was so low, he got the job. So he set about erecting the scaffolding and setting up the planks, buying paint and yes, I am sorry to say, thinning it down with water... Well, Smokey was up on the scaffolding, painting away, the job nearly completed, when suddenly there was a horrendous clap of thunder, the sky opened, and the rain poured down washing the thinned paint from all over the church and knocking Smokey clear off the scaffold to land on the lawn among the gravestones, surrounded by telltale puddles of the thinned and useless paint. Smokey was no fool. He knew this was a judgment from the Almighty, so he got down on his knees and cried: "Oh, God, Oh God, forgive me; what should I do?" And from the thunder, a mighty voice spoke.. "Repaint! Repaint!* And thin no more!"*
Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.
In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!
Now my phone is stuck on airplane mode.
Considering it was my first 4 A into programming
Me- Owww
Im always “eating disorder, eating dat order”
2 Na, of course.
Last time I told one, three little goats laughed so hard they fell off a bridge
I KNOW MY RITES!!
Because it's a soft drink.
The Fivum.
A new one popes up.
The smoke alarm wakes him
They gave me a punch card!
Probably from all the times she desserted me.
Working at the graveyard isn't for everyone though!
Carbon Dating!
If there was a soccer game between humans and bugs, the humans would crush it.
It was the teacher's pet.
But now it's starting to grow on me.
That's why they can perform Frodo synthesis.
A man with a foreign accent walked up to the front of the theatre and announced in a loud voice "Everybody please raise your hands!", over and over. People wondered what was going on but some of them decided to humor him and started raising their hands, then some more, then some more, until eventually almost everyone in the cinema had their hands raised. Suddenly power was restored and the movie continued. The patron in the seat next to him asked him "how did you do that?". He replied "As we say in my country, many hands make light work".
A chicken tender.
now they won’t leaf me alone.
FIZZician!
There was Type-O splattered everywhere.
He said "have to love Easter, baby"
Ten. You need ten ants.
It's a step by step guide
Mooslim
But unfortunately there's no Time!
A neckless.
more jokes Here waiting for you
best dad jokesjokes for adultHere, we’ve gathered the funniest dad jokes, jokes for kids, funny jokes, witty comebacks, and hilarious memes from across the web. Whether you need stress relief, a quick laugh, or the perfect icebreaker for social situations, we’ve got you covered!
Feeling down? Click in—guaranteed smiles! 😆