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avatar hacksawjim89 4 mon.ago

My dog ate our Christmas lights. I just spent 2 hours with her at the clinic and she looked so uncomfortable.

When the vet told her she was going to be OK, her little face lit up!

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. Did you hear about King Kong’s sporty cousin?

They call him Ping Pong

2. This new Vietnamese restaurant opened near my house. On opening day, they were so busy that they had to turn away some of the customers.

It was the biggest pho queue I’ve ever seen.

3. My neighbour thinks that the government put a listening device in his slow cooker

He's such a crock-pot conspiracy theorist.

4. A guy told his buddy: “I’ve got a new girlfriend

and she’s anorexic.” “Oh, right. How’s it going?” “Not too well. Each week, I’m seeing less and less of her.”

5. I got fired from my job because I simply kept asking customers if they want the smoking or non-smoking section.

It was at a funeral home and I guess I should have been asking if they wanted to be cremated or have a regular service

6. Why did the coffee file a police report?

It got mugged on the counter

7. The hairdresser said "Do you want conditioner on that?"

I said "Extra volume" She said "DO YOU WANT CONDITIONER ON THAT?"

8. Why did I call Arnold Schwarzenegger to get rid of mice in my house?

Because he's an ex-terminator!

9. The dentist examines my teeth after the dental hygienist finishes cleaning them.

Dentist: Your teeth are bleeding. Me: Because you flossed them. Dentist: Because you don't floss. Me: Because they bleed when I do floss. Dentist: BECAUSE YOU DON'T FLOSS! Me: BECAUSE IT MAKES MY GUMS BLEED!

10. Cringe joke

I heard the new Will Smith album really slaps

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