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avatar humanaura 1 year.ago

what happens when you throw a stick of butter out of the window

you see butterfly

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In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. Camouflage

Why is it spelled "camouflage" and not

2. A husband was addicted to smoking and drinking.

One day, his wife got so angry that she told him: “If you keep on smoking, all of your intestines will fall out.” Her husband didn’t believe her, so he kept on smoking and drinking just like he always did. His wife was determined to prove herself right, so one day she went out early in the morning to the local butcher shop and bought some big intestines. She stuffed them into her husband’s underwear as he slept. A short while later, he woke up, let out a huge scream, and then fell silent for the next 30 minutes. After another 30 minutes of silence, he comes downstairs, sweating profusely. “What happened?” his wife asked. “You were right! My intestines did come out, but don’t worry honey - after a lot of work, I finally managed to push them back in.”

3. What do you call James Bond with yellowish hairs ?

James Blond

4. If you have a stressful life, you should learn counting in Spanish

I mean, UNDOSTRESS

5. What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?

Attire.

6. I saw a Subway without a drive thru.

I thought: "Are we supposed to drive through the store?"

7. A brief history of time

100 years ago everyone owned a horse and only the rich had cars. Today everyone has cars and only the rich own horses. The stables have turned.

8. My grandfather flew planes in World War 2

But then they told him to stop wasting paper.

9. I've designed a new aftershave for introverts

I call it, "Leave Me The FUCologne."

10. What's the fattest city in Germany?

München, because they're always munchen on food.

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