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avatar Cowboy_Reaper 11 day.ago

Chuck Norris uses a Total gym

Because only Chuck Norris can make Chuck Norris stronger.

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. What do you call a woman who sounds like an ambulance?

Nina

2. I don't drink much water

>!But it is on my bucket list!<

3. Anyone remember absent-minded professor jokes?

The absent-minded professor sits at his desk, tapping his pen against his notebook. “Alright,” he mutters. “A knock-knock joke. Simple structure. Shouldn’t be hard.” He writes: Knock-knock. He pauses, frowns, and scratches his head. “Wait… Who’s there?” He flips through his notes. Nothing. He checks the bookshelf. No answer. He digs through his desk drawer. Just old lecture slides. Finally, he shrugs and writes: Knock-knock. Who’s there? I… don’t recall. He leans back, satisfied. “Yes. That’ll do.”

4. I am really bad at remembering names.

So I simply avoid anyone who might have one.

5. Teacher: Can you name two books by Roald Dahl, Susie?

Susie: Sure! *Charlie* and *The Chocolate Factory*!

6. Why don't the richest politicians just contribute to the national debt?

Because even though segregation has been brought back, selling Africans wasn't part of the deal to have the choice?

7. My therapist spent the whole session convincing me that I don't owe anyone anything.

Then he said I owe him $200 for the visit.

8. An English Lit teacher greets their class by announcing that they will be discussing "Lord of the Flies"

They place a conch shell on the desk, walks out of the classroom, and locks the door from the outside.

9. A three legged dog walks into a saloon and says

“I’m looking for the man who shot my pa”

10. Dracula was at dinner when his date boldly asked, “So… what’s your body count?”

“Vhat do you mean?” he replied. “It’s the thing vith arms and legs that gets me everywhere I vant to go!”

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