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avatar The0neOf0ne 3 mon.ago

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground Beef 😂

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. A couple returns from a date and she invites him in

Her: Did you bring protection? Him: Why? Is there a burglar inside? Don’t worry, I know karate. Her: No, like a condom Him (gives a weird look): You want me to fuck him??

2. Joseph of Arimathea gave his personal, expensive and hand hewn tomb for Jesus burial. All his friends were astonished and asked why he would do this.

Joseph replied "He said he was only using it for the weekend."

3. I keep coming up with jokes about unemployed people.

But none of them work.

4. A boorish man gave his order to the waitress...

A boorish man gave his order to the waitress. "I'm going to start off with a half a dozen oysters on the half shell. You know what they say about oysters, don't you, honey?" he asked as he winked at the woman. "They make you sexy." The waitress stared at him straight-faced and inquired, "Won't you need more than six, sir?"

5. I went to the aquarium this weekend, but I didn't stay long.

There was something fishy about that place

6. It would be cool if I could 3-D print a copy of my own face

But I'm getting a head of myself

7. I just got attacked by a group of mimes

They did unspeakable things to me

8. What's a cat's favorite color?

Purrgundy. I'm so sorry... I'll leave and never return...

9. What's the Saddest Mountain?

Mount Misery. It's real. It's in Connecticut.

10. What smells like rotten carrots?

Bunny farts. Happy Easter

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